It Begins....Again

After many failed attempts at launching this blog I have discovered that writing is just not my thing. As such I have decided this will not be a vlog.....podcast.....thing. I am recording my thoughts as audio to YouTube and will add it here as the blog post. This installment covers the purpose of the vlog, my new plan of attach, and my reward system for staying on target. Without any further ado, here is the 1st entry in the new format. Please be kind, I am just figuring this stuff out.

The "March" of War

The “March” of War

February was a wash. My knees have caused my plans to fall completely apart. This setback has led me to a few realizations. The 1st is that I can’t run. As much as I want to I just can’t. My knees are not strong enough. Realization the 2nd is that my Trifecta goal for this year will have to wait. I cannot risk injury again just to prove something to myself. Even if I thought I could be physically ready the risk is just too high. I need to focus on other things to ready myself for the challenge of a Spartan Race Trifecta. For now my fitness plans with focus on weight loss and strengthening my knees. Once that has happened I can focus on trying to run and train for the 2017 Trifecta.

Based on this new intel the previous Mission has been scrubbed. We have analysed our forces’ weaknesses and have devised a new plan of attack. The new Mission Briefing begins now. NOTE: previous Mission Objectives in place to reflect the changes.

2016 Missions

• Get down to 250 lbs
• Complete Spartan Trifecta Get down to at least an XL and below 40 inch waist
• Create something - this sounds vague but I know what it means and it is hard to put in words

Phase I Operations

Fitness

• Complete DDP Yoga
• Complete C25K
• Walk at least 30 min, 3 times a week
• Work out at least 3 time a week
• Get below 300

Diet (no changes needed)

• Track as much food as possible
• I will be using LoseIt, MapMyFitness, and Fitbit apps for this
• Minimal sugar intake (including carbs)
• Self-explanatory. Just cutting as much sugar out as possible
• No bored/stress/travel snacking
• This is my biggest problem. I bored eat. I stress eat. I drive a lot and tend to eat for something to do.

Life

• Less frivolous spending
• No stopping for snacks/drinks/drive-thru on daily commute
• Basically only buy things I absolutely need
• Improve time management/make better use of time/stay on task
• I tend to get distracted easily, especially at work
• Spend less leisure time on social media - big time waster
• Multitask when possible
• Do something creative just for me for at least 1 hour a week (overridden by high priority)
• Study for CS Teaching Certificate Test
• Learn Javascript

The launch date for the new Mission is February 29th. Keep watch for future Mission Updates. Until then may the Force be with you and may the Power protect you.

\m/ THERE IS NO TRY \m/

Mission Update 002

Mission Update 002

I am dropping the theme for this post because I need to clear the air. February was crazy. January was intended to be a building month. Changing old habits, building new ones, getting into a rhythm. That rhythm never really solidified unfortunately and the old habits proved they would not go away without a fight. There were a number of things the universe decided to throw in my way over the last month and as a result I have gotten WAY off track and need to get back to it.

Grown-up Insurance

If you recall in the Rebirth series my wife and I got a life insurance policy. This is what I call our “grown-up insurance.” To remind you there could possibly be an issue with my weight. Well we finally got the results back from our blood work and everything was good for both of us. We even got a call from our agent (remember he was the one who asked how quickly I could get below 300 lbs) and he said everything was fine. He even specified that everything was fine with me. Turns out that was premature. The premium we were quoted was approved for my wife, but not for me. My premium was going to be about $20/month higher. In order to maintain the quoted premium, my coverage had to be lowered. When all the paperwork came in I had to sign an acknowledgment that my premium was higher. It even said the premium was higher because of my weight. I have never had to actually sign something acknowledging that I am overweight. I signed their paper and sent it back so now I have grown-up insurance and a lot of self loathing.

Knee Problems

I went to Austin for week for a work conference at the beginning of February. I had a challenge of having to eat out for every meal for 5 days. I am proud to say that I made a number of very good choices for food. I also walked A LOT. Our hotel was about .75 miles from the convention center and the convention center is stupid huge so I walked constantly all week. I almost hit a record 20k steps in a single day. At the end of the week I had walked over 30 miles. This is all well and good but my knees paid for it. Between walking everywhere and the all-over-the-place weather Texas has had my knees were done for when I got home. I made sure to take it easy that weekend to recover. I was very motivated to take the momentum of having logged so much walking to get my running program going. Monday morning came and I got on the treadmill to do C25K Day 1 for the umpteenth time. This was not a good idea. I pushed myself a bit too hard and my knees (especially the right knee) have been killing me ever since. I have not done anything in 2 weeks.

More Knee Problems

Given the state of my knees I wear knee braces regularly. I have worn out all but 1 of them. The 1 I have is really good but it is wearing out, and I have 2 knees. This is where things get ridiculous. I ordered 2 knee braces that should have fit according to the product page. I got excited when they showed up until they did not fit. They would not go around my fat ass thighs. I sent them back. I ordered 2 more that also should have fit, this time they were name brand and heavy duty. I was all excited when they came in until once again they would not go around my stupid fat thighs. I have sent that pair back as well. I began searching the Internet for a knee brace that would fit. The only search parameter I could come up with that seemed fitting was “plus size knee brace.” That actually found me exactly what I needed. Unfortunately the size I need is only available through medical supply. That being the case, the “plus-sized knee brace” is to treat knee pain caused by obesity. It’s even call that: Bariatric Knee Brace and/or Obesity Pain Knee Brace. So I have an order ready to go as soon as Amazon processes my return of the 2nd pair that does not fit. The icing on this soul-crushing cake...the interweb’s algorithm that makes custom ads based on your browsing got 1 last good shot in. The text ads on the Amazon page for the Bariatric Knee Brace offered me an orthopedic specialist and 2 weight loss surgery centers. Frak you very much.

Emotional Baskin Robbins

Remember how I said old habits were not going down without a fight? Well my habit of eating my feelings is a combination of Clubber Lang and Ivan Drago. I have not been doing well at all on my goal of not bored/stress/emotional eating. I am doing ok with taking a healthy lunch to work and not overeating at meals but between meals, late night, and my morning drive not so much. I have gotten 2nd breakfast on my way to work a couple of times a week lately, a habit I have really been working on breaking. I won’t lie, it has not been pretty at times. I am working on it but sometimes depression voice wins out.

A New Work Stress

Sometimes the downside of doing your job well is more work. I have had a good year thus far and everyone is happy with me. Of course this means we get to add to my plate. Next year I will be adding Foundations of Computer Science to my list of classes I am teaching. That is great. As of right now it is just replacing a class I am currently teaching so it is not more work in that sense. There is a small problem with this plan. We are offering this course for high school credit. In order to do so I have to get a new teaching certificate. This means I get a new project: learn the overall basics of every aspect of computer science….and some basic coding. Luckily I have some basic coding background from working on my Google Scripts project. The rest, however, will be a challenge. Now I get to spend my free time prepping for a test and learning the content I have to teach next year. The plus side is I have all summer to learn the actual class stuff I will be teaching but I have to be ready for the test in May. I wasn’t busy enough, right?

A New Plan

Clearly the original mission needs to be reworked. I am currently working on that and will have and update hopefully March 1st. Until then may the Force be with you and may the Power protect you.

\m/ THERE IS NO TRY \m/

PS -- I went a bit GIF happy. Sorry not sorry.

January Mission Review

January Mission Summary

The Mission has suffered a major setback. January was not as productive as one would have liked. There were a number of missteps and a lot of bad intel. The original plan was to do Yoga in the mornings and cardio in the evenings. That was a complete failure. However, after regrouping and coming up with a new plan things seem to be progressing.

Mission adjustment 1: morning workout of Yoga was not….working out. After much research it was decided that the problem was a morning workout should be more energetic like cardio. Many people, including The Rock, hit the road (or treadmill) early morning and start the day with a good cardio session. This adjustment has been implemented and seems to be working.

Mission adjustment 2: any evening workouts were being impeded by an unstable schedule between myself and my commanding officer. Her schedule is constantly in flux. Here is an example of my weekly maneuvers:

• Monday - pick up the Recruit at daycare, home by 6pm if no complications. I am home with him until well after 7pm. Dinner is usually not before 6:30pm. By the time the Commander gets home it is time to get the toddler ready for bed. By the time all this is over I am too exhausted to work out. 
• Tuesday and Thursday - after school program keeps me at work until 5:30pm, sometimes 6pm. This puts me home around 7pm most of the time. Eating dinner that late makes a workout difficult. 
• Wednesday - I can go straight home and get dinner at a reasonable hour. This is the only day in the week this happens 
• Friday - Similar to Monday. Commander has work obligations that require me to pick up the Recruit, however this is somewhat sporadic so it is hard to plan around. I also have the Junior Agents to pick up from their barracks. 

Since consistency is key to any program like this I have adjusted the maneuvers schedule to hopefully work around these issues. Any evening workouts will now take place as soon as I get home.

Mission adjustment 3: the implementation of Mission adjustment 2 required that diet be adjusted as well. Before my meals increased in size and substance throughout the day with dinner being the heaviest meal. Based on the advice of a certified personal trainer friend and several articles on the subject I am inverting this plan. I will be adjusting my diet as such: breakfast will be much more substantial to help with morning cravings and sustain until lunch. Lunch was already fairly decent but will be slightly improved. Dinner is where the major change will come. I will be working out BEFORE dinner now and will have a light, protein-based meal. This will accommodate eating later in the evening and will help with recovery from the workout.

The 1st major challenge of the overall Mission will be the 1st week of February. I will be at a work conference all week. I will still be able to get my scheduled workouts in but I will have to be extra diligent with my diet. I will update the Mission log after the trip with its success or failure. Below is a full update on Phase I through January.

Phase I Operations - Quarter 1
Fitness 

• Complete DDP Yoga 
• Various starts and stops. Averaging 2 sessions per week out 5. 
• Complete C25K 
• Just completed week 1, doing well
• Get below 300
• See February Accountability Update for current progress on this goal

Diet 

• Track as much food as possible
• I am exploring myfitnesspal as well. I am about 75-80% compliant with this objective.
• Minimal sugar intake (including carbs)
• This is still going well save for the occasional snack size candy bar. I have had only one full Coke this year.
• No bored/stress/travel snacking
• Other than coffee stops this has gone well. There have been many days I have actively NOT stopped despite being very hungry

Life

• Less frivolous spending
• There has been a few slips on this front but nothing over $5-$10
• Improve time management/make better use of time/stay on task
• I am still struggling with this.
• Do something creative just for me for at least 1 hour a week
• I am not sure if it balanced out to 1 hour per week but I did do some creative things. I wired an f/x Disney Infinity 3.0 Yoda figure to light up off the game base. Continuing with Infinity I spent a few hours playing around in the Toy Box, which it very under rated. It is a fully functional game engine. I am interested in exploring this a bit more.

Stay tuned for more updates. Until then may the Force be with you and may the Power protect you

\m/ THERE IS NO TRY \m/

Mission Update 001

Mission Update 001

The Mission got off to a rocky start. The early part of the Mission seemed like things were going well. I worked out Monday and Tuesday. On 2 separate occasions I was treated to Italian, my favorite food in the world, and chose a large grilled chicken salad over a carb-heavy pasta dish. I turned down a birthday cake. Things were looking great until mid week. That’s when my depression started creeping and I started feeling like crap emotionally. I was upset and bogged down with the feels and did what I always do in said situations: I sat around, dwelling on everything, and eating my feelings. Every good food decision I had made earlier in the week was undone by angry eating. It was horrible and I felt horrible doing it. It did not make me feel any better it just changed what was messing with my head.

By the weekend I had stopped working out and was eating all the crap. Honestly, other than the occasional snack size candy bar out of the leftover Halloween candy, what I ate was not all THAT bad I just ate for the wrong reasons and way too much. I began to think about why I was doing this I had an apostrophe. People who battle with depression tend to find a coping mechanism. Not everyone chooses a healthy mechanism. This is where cutting, drugs, alcohol, and other destructive vices come into play. Clearly my emotional eating is a coping mechanism but I am beginning to question the motive behind it. I am not eating to feel happy, because it doesn’t make me feel happy. Perhaps I am eating to have some kind of control in the absence of such.

Back to the Mission. Monday the 10th was better. I worked out, though I was not really into it. I did really well on the food but that was about it. My on-going depression was the biggest roadblock this week. I have done pretty well with my food, save for the belated birthday cake someone gave me. The deliciousness of that cake equaled the hate I felt for myself for having eaten it, but I did not want to be rude. It did not take me long to realize that I have lost the self-discipline needed to work out at home right now. I need some way to jump start a routine to help make it a habit. I have looked into a few options. I really like the DDP Yoga program but with my schedule, making the time is difficult. I need to do something soon since I am already behind schedule.

Looking at the specific Mission Objectives for Phase I, things are not going well to start:

Fitness

• Complete DDP Yoga
• I’ve only done about half of the workouts for the last 2 weeks
• Complete C25K
• have not even started
• Get below 300
• no idea, only weigh in once a month

Diet

• Track as much food as possible
• about 80% of everything tracked
• Minimal sugar intake (including carbs)
• not terrible other than a few emotional snacks and the birthday cake
• No bored/stress/travel snacking
• had a few setbacks as mentioned above and slipped a few times on breakfast

Life

• Less frivolous spending
• this has been really good, save for a few QuikTrip stops for breakfast/coffee
• Improve time management/make better use of time/stay on task
• not great, I am easily distra HEY LOOK A DUCK!
• Do something creative just for me for at least 1 hour a week
• not even a little bit, though I have a project to work on I just need to get the materials

The entire reason for the slow start is my depression. As I have explained before I have very bad seasonal depression and it is taking longer than usual to come out of it. I am not sleeping well so I am more tired than usual, and emotionally I just do not feel like doing anything. I just kind of am. Hopefully things will pick up soon, because Phase I Ops are vital to completing the overall Mission. Until next time may the Force be with you and may the Power protect you.

\m/ THERE IS NO TRY \m/

January Accountability Post

Each month I will post accountability pictures, weight, and measurement. These posts will come at the beginning of each month. Below are the starting photos and stats...

January Progress Photos

January Measurements

Neck: 17.5"
Chest: 56.25"
Waist: 56"
Hips: 54.5"
R Bicep: 15.25", 16.25" flexed
L Bicep: 14.75", 16.75" flexed
R Thigh: 30"
L Thigh: 29.5"
R Calf: 21"
L Calf: 20"

May the Force be with you and may the Power protect you

\m/ THERE IS NO TRY \m/

All New, All Different Captain

Welcome to the official 1st post of the newly relaunched This Is Your Captain Speaking. This blog will serve as an accountability system for my efforts to get healthier as well as an outlet to share my thoughts and creative endeavors. We will begin with my goals or Missions for 2016. These are not New Year's Resolutions. These are Missions. The structure of my Missions and how I will be reporting my progress is modeled after the Nerd Fitness 6 Week Challenge. I'll go into more detail on the awesomeness that is Nerd Fitness in a future post. For now let's get to the Mission Briefing.

I have over-all Missions for the year that will be managed quarterly with smaller Operations (Ops) leading to the overall Objective. Ops are broken into three categories: Fitness, Diet, and Life.

2016 Missions

• Get down to 250 lbs - this is ~6 lbs per month
• Complete Spartan Trifecta
• Create something - this sounds vague but I know what it means and it is hard to put in words

Phase I Operations - Quarter 1

Fitness

• Complete DDP Yoga
• This is a 13-week program
• Complete C25K
• This is only a 9-week program but I am sure there will be weeks I need to repeat
• Get below 300
• This is completely doable and right in line with my over target for the year

Diet

• Track as much food as possible
• I will be using LoseIt, MapMyFitness, and Fitbit apps for this
• Minimal sugar intake (including carbs)
• Self-explanatory. Just cutting as much sugar out as possible
• No bored/stress/travel snacking
• This is my biggest problem. I bored eat. I stress eat. I drive a lot and tend to eat for something to do.

Life

• Less frivolous spending
• No stopping for snacks/drinks/drive-thru on daily commute
• Basically only buy things I absolutely need
• Improve time management/make better use of time/stay on task
• I tend to get distracted easily, especially at work
• Spend less leisure time on social media - big time waster
• Multitask when possible
• Do something creative just for me for at least 1 hour a week
• Flex my creative muscle. This blog does not count.

I will post Mission updates regularly with the status of each Op. These Missions are flexible and can be updated and modified as needed. The Mission begins today (January 4th) my plan right now is to post Mission updates every other Monday so look for the 1st update in 2 weeks. Until then may the Force be with you and may the Power protect you.

\m/ THERE IS NO TRY \m/

The Captain: Rebirth Issue 4.5

Previously in The Captain: Rebirth......I lost weight. Had surgery. Got depressed. Moped around. Got a baby. Moved. Had surgery again. Lost my job.

Issue #4.5 - The Final Insult

The end of 2015 was approaching which means the annual gift of holiday depression was about to make its unwelcome arrival. There were a number of items that led up to my depression this year. Back around Thanksgiving or so I got an email from Spartan Race announcing their 2016 race dates. I had considered doing a Spartan Race several times but never went through with it. On my podcast Too Nerdy For TV I even mentioned in an episode near the end of 2014 that I wanted to do a Spartan Trifecta in 2015. In a rather odd moment I was trolled by a form email. The subject line of the email from Spartan read "Last year you said this year." I was called out. I was called out by a pseudo-spammy form email. I talked to some friends at work who run Spartans all the time and decided that I am going to actually give it a shot in 2016 to do the trifecta. Shortly after that I got an unexpected punch to the gut.

My wife and I are working on getting financially secure enough to buy a house. We have enlisted the help of a financial adviser. This is a one-stop shop kind of place that does insurance, investing, retirement planning, and everything in between. We have been adulting super hard lately. We met with this guy about getting grown up life insurance and I was under the impression there were no medical questions or anything like that. WRONG! We have to give all this information about our past medical status and give fluid samples. We each gave our height and weight and that is when the punch came. The guy says, as though he is asking if we can put down a larger down payment on the car so our monthly payments go down, "Could you get down below 300 in the next 2-4 weeks?" Really? Sure, let me just drop 20 lbs just like that. No big deal. It's not like I have struggled with my weight my entire life. I can go up and down whenever I want I just choose to be overweight because it keeps me warm during the winter. I was embarrassed, I was hurt, and I was angry. I'd like to say I channeled that anger into something positive but honestly all it did was make me hate myself. Everything I ate, every workout I did not do, pretty much everything I did just made me really down on myself and did nothing for my already growing depression.

As if there were not enough amazing moments in 2015 this was also the year of clothing failures. For only the 2nd time in my life the rear seam of my pants lost their structural integrity. I was on my way to work and got out to drop off the mail and when I got back in I heard a rip. I inspected and found my pants to have ripped clean waist to....undercrotch. I ran back home and changed and spent the rest of the day humiliated. No one saw it but the shame remained. In my pant's defense they were old pants but still.... Fast forward about a month maybe and it happened AGAIN. This time AT work and in the pants I had bought to replace the pair that had ripped. This time it was MAJOR. Luckily for me I work about 3 blocks from a HUGE Wal-Mart. I took my button-down shirt off, tied it around my waist and headed off to Wal-Mart to buy an emergency pair of pants. I purchased said pants in the largest size I have ever bought, went to the bathroom, changed pants, tossed the old ones, returned to my car and proceeded to cry for the next 10 minutes. I was nearing rock bottom. Both of these happened before the aforementioned "how fast can you drop 20 lbs" incident so that was made SO much better. Fast forward another couple of weeks and pair number 3 splits. Luckily this was a small rip, no one noticed, and I got home just fine. Now these last 2 pairs came from the same outlet mall so perhaps they were defective and I got what I paid for. However, that still does not make the whole situation less humiliating and devastating.

Speaking of pants, 2015 decided to kick me one last time before the end of the year. My wife insisted on taking me clothes shopping for my birthday (which is 2 weeks after Christmas but we made use of after-Christmas sales). I despise clothes shopping. I find no joy in it and this was no different. We went to Kohl's and there was not a pair of pants in the entire store in my size. That was soul crushing. To know that you are officially fatter than the clothes at the store really takes the wind out of you. My wife happily searched the store for shirts she thought I would look good in and I tried every one of them on, hating myself more and more with every look in the mirror. The clothes are very nice and I love my wife for wanting me to look my best. She loves picking out clothes for me. She also understands how touchy the subject is and she even mentioned how bad she felt that I could not find large enough pants.

That brings us to the end of 2015. I know I need to fix a lot of things is my life and this blog is an attempt at accountability and working through some of those things. My 1st post of the new year will be all the things I want to accomplish in 2016. Rather than New Year's Resolutions I am considering them goals. I will keep the goal list updated for everyone to keep up with the progress. Until then may the Power protect you and may the Force be with you.

\m/ THERE IS NO TRY \m/

The Captain: Rebirth Issue 4

Previously in The Captain: Rebirth......I lost weight. Had surgery. Got depressed. Moped around. Got a baby. Moved. Had surgery again.

Issue #4 - 2015: The Most Humbling Year....Not Necessarily in a Good Way

This issue actually opens in November of 2014. I had just had surgery on my right knee for a similar injury as my left knee. This was different though. My left knee was due to heavy lifting and stress during 2 back-to-back moves. This was just me. I had done this. My weight had put too much strain on my knees and caused this damage. This hit me pretty hard. I was in a REALLY bad place. Add that to the usual holiday depression and anxiety it was just a perfect storm of sadness. I went into 2015 feeling worse than I did going into 2013. Little did I know the hits would just keep on coming.

In December my boss had a sit down with me about my job performance. It had slipped due to my depression and people were beginning to notice. I started 2015 knowing things needed to change at work if nothing else. I really did try, but my heart was not in it and I knew it was time to start looking at other options. The baby, now pretty much a toddler, was continuing to be the enemy of everything so I was not getting any workouts in. In my continuing poser theme I bought a new piece of workout equipment that has just sat in my garage ever since. Once again I made all these grand plans that I did not follow through with. Every time I was going to start a workout program (4am is the best time for me to work out which sucks) the baby would not sleep through the night or he would get up stupid early. I would basically tell myself, "well you could not start today so you should just not even bother." I am REALLY good at persuading myself not to work out. It's the great ironies of being fat: A: you eat because you are unhappy that you are fat, which makes you fatter, and 2: you have no energy to work out because you are fat but if you would work out you would not be fat and would have more energy. The universe is really stupid sometimes.

I coasted through the 1st several months of 2015 business as usual. In April things with work really got exciting. Back near the end of 2014 I became a Google for Education Certified Trainer. I was so proud. This was the biggest professional accomplishment I had ever achieved. In February I presented several sessions at the annual educational technology conference in Austin. Things were looking great professionally except at my actual job. My wife and had decided to use our tax refund to pay off my car. I had never done this before and was super excited. I went to the bank and wrote the final check and went back to work. I was asked to come speak with my boss at 2pm that afternoon. It was not a good meeting. Long story short in the course of about 5 hours I went from elated that I paid off my car to crushed because I had lost my job. Not only had I lost my job but I had to run out my contract which still had 2 months on it. That was awful.

This disappointment led into the summer where I still had no job. Most people do not realize jobs are like relationships and job hunting is like dating. You go out looking for jobs (single people) and go on interviews (dates) and hope they like you enough to at least continue to see you for a while. Job hunting is the worst. I hated it. I had so many times I was SURE I had the job only to be fed a line about going another way. I was beginning to question my entire career choice and wondering if I had made a terrible mistake in choosing this profession. I did eventually find a new job, but that did not change the fact that based on my contract with both jobs I was going to be without pay for the North end of 90 days. Let me explain that again: after being laid off and finding a new job I was still going 3 months without pay. The only shining light in all this job business was I got the summer off to spend with my kids.

The summer ended and it was time for me to start my new job. I was NOT looking forward to this job. I felt like I had settled. I did not want to go back in the classroom but I had to have a job. The fall semester of work was unlike anything I had expected. I LOVE my job! Everything was coming together so serendipitously. I really felt like things were looking up. The only downside is I drive an hour to and from work every day which is not very fun. This job also allowed me to get my very 1st professional training gig which was a lot of fun. Things are going really well, despite a few setbacks I can't talk about here, and I am actually enjoying work. For the 1st time in possibly ever I feel like this is where I am supposed to be professionally. This whole experience was very humbling. I had never lost a job before and it truly made me appreciate what I had.

2015 had one more sucker punch in store, but since this post started getting a bit long-winded I decided to break it into 2 posts. Hell if Harry Potter, Twilight, Hunger Games, and Divergent can do it, why not? Peter Jackson can stretch a single book in to 9 hours worth of a movie; I can split a wordy blog post into 2. That being said stay tuned for the final installment -- The Captain: Rebirth Issue #4.5: The Final Insult

\m/ THERE IS NO TRY \m/

The Captain: Rebirth Issue 3

Previously in The Captain: Rebirth....I lost a lost of weight then had knee surgery and spent an entire year feeling sorry for myself. An. Entire. Year.

Issue #3 - 2014: The Captain vs. The Baby

In the later part of 2013 I decided I was going to get back on the horse and try to do an obstacle course race. I even thought if I signed up for one and spent the money I would be motivated to actually go through with it. Guess what? WRONG. I estimate that I have spent about $200 in races I have never actually run. I had these grand ideas of running all these races and did not do a damn thing to make it happen.

In January 2014 I got this wild idea that I was actually going to stop feeling sorry for myself and do what I set out to do in 2012 and run an obstacle course race. As I laid out in a previous post I got REALLY ambitious and signed up for 3 races that year. 1 got canceled, 1 I bailed on, but the 3rd I actually did. Out of shape, in now way prepared for it I ran Survival Race Dallas on April 27, 2014, with a time of {around 1 hour 30 minutes. I can’t find my finisher dog tag with my time on it}. It was really difficult but I was very proud of myself. I met some awesome people that helped me through the course and had a great time.

I had hoped that would have helped me move forward and kick start things but as the song says "life has a funny way of sneaking up on you when you think everything's okay and everything's going right." It turns out my child hated sleep. For those of you unaware, babies and toddlers are the enemies of everything. They are the enemies of sleep. They are the enemies of productivity. They are the enemies of EV. RY. THING. I had a number of false starts on fitness and such because I was always so frakking tired. I even had to convert my desk at work to a standing desk because I kept falling asleep. Seriously, this child never slept. It was awful.

Needless to say I was more worried about getting as much sleep as possible than anything else so I really did not get much else accomplished in my life. The one thing I DID do was persuaded my wife to buy me a Groupon for Title Boxing Club. It was 2 free weeks and a personal training session. After my 1st 2 weeks I signed up for a 3-month membership. I was going Monday, Wednesday, and Friday at 6am for a one hour boxing/kickboxing class. I LOVED it. I tried boxing many, many, many years ago and fell in love with it. I have tired to keep it as part of my fitness routine ever since. The only issue was the longer I went the less I was able to go because again babies are the enemy. The simple act of going to the gym at 6am 3 days a week was clearly not that simple. Despite my desire to continue going I was missing too many days to justify the cost. Though it was not sustainable it was the best I did all year and actually starting making decent progress. Somewhere in all this I got a Fitbit Zip and started working on tracking my steps. I was really enjoying it and was even doing step goal competitions with my friends. However, having a Fitbit and not actually doing anything kinda makes you a poser.

The summer was more of the same as I had to work for the 1st summer in 7 years (usually had the summer off as a teacher). Summer came to an end and we had to start looking for a new house because our super old landlord was selling our rent house out from under us with almost no notice. Other than the stress of having to move and the WORST time of the year* this move created a new problem. I was lucky enough to have a man cave at our old place and a big field out back to work out. Our new place was going to be quite limited on space. So of course I made the best of it and was that much more dedicated, right? Not so much. Just another excuse.

As we approached the last quarter of 2014 things got SUPER awesome. I was shopping with my family and all of a sudden I was on the floor. My right knee had given out on me and it hurt very much bad. It was a different kind of pain than I had with my left knee back in '012 but it was a much more intense pain. After I fell a few more times over the course of a several weeks my wife and I decided I needed to go to the doctor. I suspected I had psoriatic arthritis as I have suffered from the heartbreak of psoriasis for many years. I went to the doctor and he almost immediately dismissed that theory. He sent me for an MRI and I was referred to another ortho specialist. As the deja vu really set in I was told, almost exactly 2 years after the left knee, I had a torn meniscus in my right knee and would once again need surgery.

Here is the cliffhanger panel of the comic. Stay tuned for the final issue where we find out how I reacted to my surgery and how 2015 went. Spoiler: not well on either front.

\m/ THERE IS NO TRY \m/

*My wife is a band director and we were moving during marching season which is the busiest time of year for her.

The Captain: Rebirth Issue 2

Previously in The Captain: Rebirth....I lost a lot of weight, felt really good about myself, and was preparing to run an obstacle course 5K. Then I had to have knee surgery and it all came crashing down.

Issue #2 - 2013: The Pity Party

2012 ended on a number of sour notes. However during the last week of the year my wife and I found out we were having a baby. We were both very excited. As 2013 began I was firmly rooted in a depression as a result of my knee injury and subsequent surgery. I treated that depression like anyone would: I ate all the things. I was an emotional Baskin Robbins with 31 flavors of feelings. Of course all this accomplished was undoing all the hard work I had done the previous year. I basically coasted through 2013 feeling sorry for myself. The only good thing that came out of it was in my search for post-op workout options I found DDP Yoga. Someone suggested yoga so I started looking around for yoga I could tolerate. I am a huge wrestling fan and enjoyed doing Rushfit with GSP so the idea of something similar from one of my favorite wrestlers was very intriguing. I borrowed the DVDs and did a few of the workouts and was surprised by how much I enjoyed it. Since then I have had countless false starts at completing the program but I am definitely a fan.

Health and fitness were a major problem in 2013 but professionally things were really improving. I started presenting at professional conferences and making a lot of new connections. This led to me leaving the job I had been with for 7 years for a new opportunity. This was a very exciting development. I started that job in August and was optimistic that I had found a new home. That would not exactly be the case but that is a story for later. This new job introduced me to a whole new area of my profession of which I was previously unaware. I became engrossed in all things Google. I have been a fan of Google products for a long time but I had never looked under the hood. The school district I was with used Google Apps for Education and our director was big on professional development. I did not know I was getting my first taste of what would later be the driving force of my career.

As if the pity party and career change were not enough we had a baby on the way to add to the mix. We spent most of the year planning and preparing for his arrival. Doctor's appointments, rearranging bedrooms, and learning all about things I never really wanted to know about ( I somehow missed all that fun with my first two kids). We anxiously awaited Labor Day, which was both the day my wife went in to labor and the holiday. She did not find this funny. So Blake arrived and the remainder of 2013 is kind of a blur because sleep was not on the agenda.

This update does not have much detail in it because quite frankly I felt so sorry for myself for most of the year and this post reflects how much I did to take care of myself. A year after my surgery and I was no better off than I was a year before the surgery. In the next installment we will explore the age old battle of man vs. baby and sleep continues to be a jerk and elude me.

\m/ THERE IS NO TRY \m/

The Captain: Rebirth Issue 1

This blog will get its full relaunch in January but to prepare and bring everyone up to speed I will close out 2015 with a 4-issue mini series establishing the new status quo (though a lot of this has been covered in previous posts). With that, here is issue #1 - 2012: Progress and Pain

We begin with the TARDIS controls set to 2012. Early that year I entered a Biggest Loser contest at work. I had done so once before but did not really do much. This time I was all in. I had recently found the app LoseIt and was tracking my food and my workouts but had not really used it much. I began tracking everything and lost over 30 pounds during the contest. I did lose the contest but I was very proud of my progress. My workout of choice was GSP Rushfit and the Couch to 5K program. I was working out 6 days a week and running almost every day and got down close to 250lbs. I was able to run non stop for 10 minutes which is an AMAZING accomplishment for me. I will admit that I let things slip a bit over that summer but stayed the course.

Since I was completing the Couch to 5K program I figured I should sign up for a race. I started looking for local races and discovered the crazy world of obstacle course races. I started doing some research and found the Mighty Mud Dash was being held near me in November. I was immediately hooked and started training to run the race. I got to within a month of the race and tragedy struck. I had been experiencing a lot of pain and popping in my left knee but I was trying to muscle through it. The pain reached an apex when I fell off the treadmill. My wife and I decided it was time to go to the doctor. I went to the doctor and they sent me for an MRI and referred me to an orthopedic specialist. The specialist gave me to bad news: I had torn my left medial meniscus and would need surgery to fix it....and the race was off.

I was devastated. I had worked so hard for so long and just when the goal was in sight it was taken away. Early November 2012 I had surgery to repair my damaged knee and spent the rest of the year setting up decorations for what would become and VERY long pity party. 2012 did end on a pleasant note, however. A day or so after Christmas my wife and I found out we were having a baby! If this were a comic book this would be the last panel where my wife and I are looking at the pregnancy test with a tease for the next issue.

And here is the preview for the next issue. As 2013 begins I am faced with many new challenges, changes, and a chance to overcome the setback of late 2012. How will I handle all these new things in my life? Found out in Issue #2 - 2013: The Pity Party. Spoiler alert: not well.

\m/ THERE IS NO TRY \m/

Ferb, I know what we're gonna do today!

There's 104 days till Survival Race Dallas

And I’m too out of shape now to own it

So the imminent problem for my overweight @$$

Is finding a good way to tone it

Like maybe... 

Doing some yoga

Or maybe some boxing

Or picking up a tractor tire

Discovering muscles that didn't exist

They feel like they’re all on fire

Using battle ropes

And some videos

This rhyming’s becoming a strain

Finding my target zone

With my heart rate watch

And driving my dear wife insane

As you can see

There's a whole lot of stuff to do

Before I do this race

So check back here and see if maybe I 

Fell flat on my face

So check back here and see if maybe I 

Fell flat on my face

Lets start with a little background. I relaunched this blog back in 2012 to document my fitness routine after my son told me I was too fat to be a Power Ranger. You can go back and look at the backlog for all of that. Then this happened: Knee Surgery Post. Then a whole lot of nothing to back up all that posturing. Then this happened: More of the Same BS. Now it is just over a year after my knee surgery and I have let everything go and then some. 2012 might as well have not happened. I have put back on more weight than I lost thanks to a big stinking pity party over my knee. I stepped on the scale the other day to see what the holidays had done to my already awful situation and I was crushed. I had broken a promise to myself. I swore I would never break 300 lbs again and last Monday morning I weighed in at 300.4. Letting myself go before was one thing but seeing that number on the scale was the last straw.

Back in 2012 I had decided that I wanted to do a mud run obstacle course 5K thing. I have never been a big fan of running and doing a 5K never really appealed to me. Then I heard about a zombie 5K and it sounded great. I wanted to do it with some friends but no one was really down and it was way out of town and it was just not a good thing. I found a MUCH closer run that was just an obstacle course and it looked so much fun. I decided it was the closest I would ever get to being on Ninja Warrior. Well my knee injury ended all that. I signed up for a few more runs after that but never went through with them for one reason or another. After a year of feeling sorry for myself I decided that the pity party ends NOW. Through a Groupon, a discount for canceling, and a New Year's sale I have signed up for 3 races this year. I will be doing The Survival Race on April 27th, Mud Factor on June 21st, and ending with Savage Race on September 13th. It just so happened that my first race is in 104 days, thus the lame attempt at a Phineas and Ferb joke to kick this off.

So what will I be doing to get in shape for this thing? Well, here is the basic plan: DDP Yoga, GSP RushFit, battle ropes (in my case an old firehose), tires, boxing, running programs Couch to 5K and Zombies, RUN!, my Fitbit Zip, and a number of fitness apps such as Runkeeper, LoseIt, and mapmyfitness. That sounds like a lot but hear me out. The main things I will be doing are the running programs, DDP Yoga, and RushFit. Those are my constants. When the weather balances back out I will be using a strength training routine I devised from hours of research utilizing battle ropes and tires. When I am not able to go outside to for that routine RushFit will serve as my strength training program as well as my go-to ab workout. Lastly, the boxing is because it is a helluva workout and SO much fun!

Over the next several weeks this blog will return to being a record of my fitness journey as well as covering some of the things I am using and why I am using them. It will be hard work but I have done it before and I know I can do it again. I know diet will be my biggest obstacle to overcome. My baby is starting to sleep through the night and is getting on a more regular schedule so that will help as well. I actually have the energy at the end of the day now to get a workout in. As long as I manage my time, manage my diet, and stay focused I should be just fine.

Until then MAY THE POWER PROTECT YOU!

\m/ IS NO TRY \m/

*BLEEP* just got real

I have decided to take this blog in a much more personal direction. When I launched it I did not intend on it being a fitness blog, but it has become that. That will most likely be its primary function with other stuff sprinkled it. As it relates to the fitness stuff I am going to stop pulling punches, so to speak, and start being more honest and open about everything. I am shooting for one post per week right now. I really want to post more often but I have a lot of things on my plate right now. Stay tuned and bring the tissues.

\m/ IS NO TRY \m/

Don't Call It A Come Back...

I'm back! I have let this blog get away from me over the last few months, but there is a reason. I have been recovering from injury/surgery. In case you have not been following, here's the story...

I was training for an obstacle course 5K that was to take place in November. All Through my training U was fighting a nagging knee pain. Turns out that pain was actually a somewhat serious injury. I broke down and went to the doctor when I fell off the treadmill in pain. I had an MRI done and it was revealed that I had a "compound tear of the left medial meniscus  and that was going to require surgery. That took me out of my race. I was very upset, to say the lest. Over two months of training and I was sidelined two weeks before the event. I had surgery on November 30th and everything went fine.

The surgery may have fixed my knee, but it broke something else...my spirit. Sorry if that sounds overly dramatic but it is the truth. I spent most of 2012 working out a eating better and I was fianlly going to prove to myself that I was not just the fat nerd that makes everyone laugh and that opportunity was taken away. I did more in 2012 than I have in my entire life up to that point combined. I lost about 50 lbs, lost several inches all over, dropped a shirt size, my belt did nto fit anymore, and my wedding ring fell off. The I hit the brick wall of this frakking knee.

I was very concerned that I would backslide during my recovery and I dd just that. I took my "do or do not" mantra a bit too literally and "did not." With the exception of eat all the things. I threw myself a fully catered pity party and ate the whole spread. Never let it be said that I don't have feeling...I have 20 lbs of them. And none of them tasted like happy. I have spent the last few months feeling sorry for myself and letting myself get  lazy. I have noticed that my clothes are not loose like they were getting and I can see where I have put weight back on. Well I am here to declare NO MORE! This is not about a New Year's Resolution, it is about me getting off my lazy bum and getting back at it (it just happens to be January).

Now that you are up to speed.... where to go from here. I was scheduled for the Run For Your Lives Zombie 5K (my first 5K since I did not get to do my original first 5K) in March, but it was moved to the only weekend in June I have a conflict. Turns out that may not be a bad thing. I tried running last night for the first time: big mistake! About 45 seconds in to the run my knee let me know I was not ready for that. And it has continued to remind me not to try that again any time soon. For now I am focusing on body weight strength training. I am using a bike and walking to build up my knee and lower body work for strength. I bought a new punching bag over Christmas I am ready to try out and I am doing the RUSHFIT thing again. GSP is currently in training camp for his March 16th fight with Nick Diaz so I am doing Battle Camp and "training along with him". I am better than my knee injury and I will win.

\m/ TRY NOT. DO. OR DO NOT. THERE IS NO TRY \m/

30 Days and counting...

I have not posted in a several days because I have barely had time to workout let alone blog about working out. Last Thursday I went to a concert with my dad (Aussie Floyd FTW), Friday I had dinner with my folks, Saturday I was podcasting all morning then spent the rest of the day with my folks again, Sunday I did a light workout, and Monday was a holiday with my kids so I spent that time with them. I got back at it last night and could tell I have been slacking the last few days. My run is picking up and my legs are about to fall off. I really need to get past my "I hate to warm up/cool down. I would rather just get to the workout" hangups and actually stretch. Things are beginning to settle back down with my schedule and I will be back on track by the end of the week. I am getting very nervous about this run. It is officially a month away and every time I think about it I get anxious. Perhaps that is part of why I am slacking. But as Yoda tells us: Fear leads to Anger, Anger leads to hate, Hate leads...to suffering.

Side note: I signed up for another run! I know, right?!? The run that started this whole crazy plan is coming to DFW. More specifically to Forney, which is just right down the road. Since the location is what mainly stopped the Austin run, I have no excuse this time so I signed up (apparently all you have to do is tell me the price is about to increase and I will sign up). This run is in March so assuming the world does not end in December I will be tackling the Zombie Apocalypse!

\m/ IS NOT TRY \m/

38 Days...

Did a good run last night then a good (albeit once again interrupted) boxing workout. I just (and I do mean just as I closed the tab and open this one) ordered a new water bottle, new speed wraps, and knuckle protectors from Title MMA. They had a free shipping plus 10% off sale that I jumped on. Their shipping is so high that I try and place an order everytime they do free shipping. Their sister company Title Boxing (although I am not really sure what the difference is as they both seem to have the merchandise) had a similar sale a week or so ago but I had not gotten paid yet. This one hit just at the right time. Hopefully the knuckle protectors will do their job. My hands looks like I have really been fighting. I'm going to a concert tonight so there will be no working out. I'll be back at it Friday and this weekend.

\m/ IS NOT TRY \m/

39 Days...

I did the treadmill (C25K W3D2) last night along with a good tire workout. I was really nervous about the tires since that was when my arm went crazy. My wrist sounded like a bowl of Rice Krispies, but it did not hurt too bad. Got boxing and treadmill on deck for tonight. I am trying VERY hard not to get sick but I am not letting that stop me.

Side note: I have decided to stop weighing in every day. I am getting discouraged and frustrated at the inconsistency and fluctuation. I will have a good series of weigh-ins and then shoot up 4-5 lbs when nothing has changed. This would make sense if it was water weight or something and I was just bloated that day but it stays with me and I have to work it off again. That gets to be quite discouraging. I am just going to keep doing what I am doing and maybe weigh in once a week but I am avoiding the scale for the most part for the time being.

\m/ IS NO TRY \m/

40 Days...

Too the day off. I am not feeling well (sinuses are being stupid) and my arm is still giving me trouble. I was going to run, but my wife was sick in bed and the treadmill is in the bedroom. *But can you just run outside?* No, I can't Running outside hurts my knees too much and plus it was raining. Wife's sickness permitting I am going to do treadmill tonight and either box or tires. I really want to get back to the tires, but I am worried about exacerbating my arm.

\m/ IS NO TRY \m/

43 Days...42 Days...41 Days

Got in a good run and a good boxing workout this weekend. My arm WAS getting better but now it hurts more than ever. I have a run due today and I am going to try the tires again I think. Hopefully that works for me.

\m/ IS NOT TRY \m/